Tuesday, December 06, 2016

december songs 6

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know...
 
december song 6 is heard somebody say by devendra banhart. again, hard to narrow it down to one song by a favorite musician of mine. the simple message in this song really struck me the first time i heard it. plus the video is groovy. fun fact, dv and i share a tattoo. i saw him perform in dc in 2007 and i wrote a gushing review here. lyrics follow.



I heard somebody say
That the war ended today
But everyone knows it's goin' still
Our motherlands and motherseas
Here's what we believe
It's simple
We don't want to kill
I heard somebody say
That the war ended today
But everyone knows its goin' still
Our motherlands and motherseas
Here's what we believe
It's simple
We don't want to kill
Oh, it's simple
We don't want to kill
Oh, it's simple
We don't want to kill
Oh, it's simple

Monday, December 05, 2016

december songs 5

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know...

december song 5 is wizard flurry home by mariee sioux. thinking about standing rock and hoping the good news sticks! lyrics follow.
 


dance, dance, snow
flur, flurry home
and dance, dance, snow
flur, flurry home

oh, wizard, weave gold
wave, wave, wave your title
wizard, pound your
mor, mor, mortar pestle
wizard, weave gold
wave, wave, wave your title
wizard, pound your
mor, mor, mortar pestle
oh, mortar pestle and
dance, dance in snow
and flur, flurry home

and winter, love holds
crown, crown, crown your brothers
winter, love snows
crown, crown, crown your mountains
winter, love holds
crown, crown, crown your mothers
winter, love snows
crown, crown, crown your mountains
and dance, dance in snow
and flur, flurry home
oh, flur, flurry home

and cocoon, bedspoon
i beg, i beg, i beg your pardon
cocoon, bedspoon
i beg, i beg, i beg your pardon
cocoon, monsoon
break, break, breaks the roof in
cocoon, monsoon
it break, break, breaks my heart in two
in two, two, in two
and it was two, oh, oh, five
and so new, new, so new
it was so new, new, new
new, new, so new

and brown, brown
oh, brown knees, white bees'
hum, hum, hum are missing
brown knees, white bees'
hum, hum, hum are missing
could you p-lease
turn, turn, turn to honey
could you p-lease
turn, turn, turn to morning
could you p-lease
turn, turn, turn tomorrow and
turn our dance into ice
oh, freeze our dance under lakes
and turn our dance into ice
oh, freeze our dance under lakes and
freeze our dance into snow-oh-angel pillows
freeze our dance into snow-oh-angel pillows
freezing our dance
into snow angel pillows

Sunday, December 04, 2016

december songs 4

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know...

december song 4 is by laura marling, and it is actually four songs in a short film called, when brave bird saved. i first heard her on the radio several years ago when once i was an eagle released, the album that these songs are from. her sensual voice struck me. and she was around 23 when she released that album, such a wise soul with a mature voice. lyrics follow.

Saturday, December 03, 2016

december songs 3

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know...

december song 3 is by burning spear, and it is called walk. i saw burning spear here in charlottesville back in the day when star hill brewery was across from the train station. it was a profound experience, seeing this legendary man in such a tiny venue. i loved his moves and his voice and his energy. lyrics follow.
 



Walk
Walk
Walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Walk the ARABIAN walk
Walk
Walk the AFRICAN walk
Walk
Walk the AMERICAN walk
Walk
Walk the BRAZIL walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Walk
Walk
Walk
Walk
AUSTRALIAN walk
Walk
NEW ZEALAND walk
Walk
NEW CALEDONIA walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Walk CANADIAN walk
Walk
Walk the ENGLISH walk
Walk
Walk the GERMAN walk
Walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
Let's keep on moving
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Walk the SWITZERLAND walk
Walk
Walk the FRENCHMANS walk
Walk
Walk the ITALIAN walk
Walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Just keep on moving
Just keep on moving
Just keep on moving
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk
Walk
Walk the JAPAN walk
Walk
Walk the CHINESE walk
Walk
You can walk, walk, walk, walk, walk
Walk your COUNTRY walk

Friday, December 02, 2016

december songs 2

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know...

december song 2 is by sigur ros, and it is called glosoli. it is challenging for me to pick just one sigur ros video, as they are all so artful. this is a favorite song of tristan's. he used to ask me to play elf music in the car, and specifically the song that rocked out. glósóli is it! lyrics follow.



Nú vaknar þú
allt virðist vera breytt
ég gægist út
en er svo ekki neitt

úr-skóna finn svo
á náttfötum hún
í draumi fann svo
ég hékk á koðnun?

með sólinni er hún
og er hún, inni hér

en hvar ert þú....

legg upp í göngu
og tölti götuna
sé ekk(ert) út
og nota stjörnurnar
sit(ur) endalaust hún
og klifrar svo út.

Glósóli-leg hún
komdu út

mig vaknar draum-haf
mitt hjartað, slá
úfið hár.

Sturlun við fjar-óð
sem skyldu-skrá.

og hér ert þú

fannst mér.....

og hér ert þú

Glósóli.....

Translation

Glowing Sun

Now that you’re awake
Everything seems different
I look around
But there’s nothing at all

Put on my shoes,
I then find that
She is still in her pyjamas
Then found in a dream
I’m hung by (an) anticlimax

She is with the sun
And it’s out here

But where are you…
Go on a journey
And roam the streets
Can’t see the way out
And so use the stars
She sits for eternity
And then climbs out
She’s the glowing sun
So come out I awake from a nightmare
My heart is beating
Out of control…

I’ve become so used to this craziness
That it’s now compulsory
And here you are…
I’m feeling…
And here you are, Glowing sun…
And here you are, Glowing sun…
And here you are, Glowing sun…
And here you are…

Thursday, December 01, 2016

december songs 1

(click here to go straight to video) 

this week just blows. do you not agree? seriously, on so many fronts—personal, political, and just incidental, it's a week of crap.

i am however, a grateful person. perhaps i haven't always been, but as i grow, so does my gratitude. i try to let the light lead me. i do try. beauty is everywhere. emotion, even difficult, is preferable to numbness. and life. the life cycle. serendipity. coincidence. trials. fate. it is an amazing mystery.

december has arrived and midwinter approaches. the promise of new life lies ahead while all around is the crush of dead leaves. samsara. the rule of three. consequences. karma. 

the spindle thin trees dance while a sunset lifts its sexy blanket. night is clear as cut glass full of glimmer.

i wasn't going to write this long intro, but this evening i stepped under a magic sky with the dog skye, and was moved.

we both wanted to bask in it, the every star that is somehow showing. venus, so big and bright and tantalizing, and the orange moon, a tea cup, a hint of its whole round self dipping in, like a lit up ginger snap.

filaments of starlight have the power to pull at your deep seas. i felt a lot of feels under that sky. in just five minutes one can drown and emerge with glowing hair. all this to say that, when life blows, there is always the sky, especially tonight's sky. it is so very hard to believe that such cruelty could exist under such spectacular beacons. 

but what i really came here to say is that because it all blows so much these days. and because there is just the worst possible news around every corner, i need to find something that speaks to my heart. something cathartic. and i think it's music. better yet, music with a visual component. 

i am making it a goal this december to find a video a day that just says it. maybe it is bitter, hopeful, tragic, or celebratory. maybe it inspires. i do hope that some of you may also find it cathartic. let me know... (oh, and no way will each entry have a long intro!)

the first december song is by mutual benefit, and it is called getting gone. lyrics follow.




Out from the sleeping bag
Another day to be had
And it almost feels like new
But I was dreaming of you

And now we're back on the road
Another season of shows
Until every thought is gone
And we're just rolling along

And I forgot how to feel
Every sight is surreal
If there's one thing that I know
It's that all good times go
And the hard times too

And the life that we had
Is the dream of my youth
It was too good to be true
And the highway stretches on
I just want to get gone

Saturday, November 12, 2016

Open Season

I feel paralyzed. . .

By the labeling of protesters as the hatred they speak against. The catch-22 of it.

By a call to dialogue with the Trump voters, when dialogue has been impossible from the start. Nobody’s stand has changed! 

By all the nasty turns and dirty lies and violent repercussions coming now relentlessly from the Trump/Pence camp.

I feel paralyzed learning that those I believed would put humanity first, DIDN’T.

And paralyzed by the idea that, had Hillary won, we would be facing an armed insurrection. That the hate crimes would be even worse, because the racist backlash angered by eight years of Obama, would be further emboldened by an ancient misogyny. What would the protests be like if it wasn't the liberals protesting?

I’m paralyzed by smugness. From Republicans who voted for Trump simply to remain loyal to their party, now feeling victorious. From those who voted for Bernie like I did in the primaries, who chose casting blame on the DNC over casting an emergency vote for Hillary. From those who were conned and will never, ever admit it. 

I feel paralyzed. . .

By all the faults of all the parties and all the hypothesizing. 

By a system that I’ve never fully trusted.

By my habit of turning to social media hoping to find empowerment or community or action, and instead, feeling paralyzed. 

By my concern for my daughter, a college freshman, who, the day after the election, was called a pussy by a group of men in a passing car. By my concern for my seven year old son, who must never accept Trump's example as an acceptable male standard.

I feel paralyzed by concern for those who are being targeted. And I feel paralyzed knowing that we are all targets. It's open season.

I feel paralyzed. But I know that I mustn’t be.  

I know that it’s time to design my plan of action, to do the work of upholding what is at risk, to watch and defend and report. These things have been important all along, but this feels like last call. 

While I am jolted by fear, I know too that fear is what played into the (small) hands of Trump. 

It’s time to lift our great bright light shield against the doom, to be victorious in other races aside from the presidential race, and to gather the love. 

Because a great wall of love is what the haters will come up against. 

And no one builds a better wall of love than us.

Saturday, October 15, 2016

voices in my head

yesterday i took a walk with my dog. 

it was the farthest i've walked with her off leash. she was such an awesome companion, splashing through the creek, coming and going but always staying within range. it reinforced my heart connection to the wild. 

it was the best possible therapy after a really difficult week. 


while i was walking with her and feeling alive, the voice of trump occasionally tainted my inner dialogue. it would barge in, saying trumpian things like, "i have all best trees." 

i was walking through the woods, you see. 

that the voice of this pernicious virulent xenophobe was echoing in my skull made me quite uneasy. his voice has become omnipresent. people are impersonating him (all the best people). he is being broadcast. and even when denouncing him through sketch comedy or political dissection, his voice is reinforced.

it feels personal. 

it feels like an abusive man has manipulated his way into my psyche. a man with the ill intention to dominate, rule, and have his way. 

i know i have the power to exercise his voice from my inner world. and i hold on to so much hope that no way will he be elected. but that his voice is there at all, digs the deepest pit of disappointment. so many of us are in that pit together. right now.

i scroll through my facebook newsfeed in the evening. sometimes once, sometimes multiple times. the dialogue about things that matter is one of the few good things coming out of this travesty of an election. a dialogue that has arisen out of very deep concern. 


there is now the very prevalent spotlight on sexual harassment. and the bombastic voice of dismissal ringing out, minimizing acts of violence against women, and attempting to absolve the language of degradation. all the worst words.

as a woman i find myself recounting situations where a man, a leering older man, or a real fast young asshole, has invaded my space. i have not suffered rape. but i have had my sacred space penetrated. 

like the time i was trying on a skirt at a fair; the shopkeeper was straightening it out for me when suddenly he groped me. just like trump describes. he grabbed me by the pussy. i was an adolescent. no man had ever touched me there. i said nothing, as if we'd brushed elbows. but i froze inside. i retreated into the dressing room feeling confused and frightened. i left without a word to my companions, who may have also been groped. what i can't fathom in my adulthood is why i bought the skirt.

there was the time i was home from college for the summer. i was walking down the street and an older man pulled over, asking me if i needed a ride. when i said no, he asked me how old i was. thinking that i should be polite, i told him, "18." he said creeper-like, "you look like a school-girl." i carried on and so did he. but i was left with a dirty silt on my skin.


when i was a twenty-something living in seattle, another old creep pulled over. he asked where REI was. in a friendly tone i instructed, "go straight three blocks. turn left. you can't miss it" he narrowed his eyes at me and said with thin lips, "will you get in and help me find it?" i carried on and so did he. but this time i wanted to throw street garbage at his car as it slowly crept forward. 

there are so many other incidences. a stranger who telephoned daily after my grade school day and before my mother came home from work, saying nasty sexual things to me, until i fooled him into thinking the phone was bugged. a classmate who flashed his penis at me on the school bus. boys pulling my dress up. an old man in a medieval cypriot fort following me around telling me i'm easy because i'm american. a man sidling up to me in the woods on a himalayan trail insisting i "be his friend." a stepfather who called my mom and i words like cunt and slut. a boyfriend who told me it was my duty to have sex with him. and all those times a man has stared at my breasts, rather than my face, while talking to me. 


these are the acts that trump defends and minimizes. this is the culture he brings with him to this election. it's time women spoke out. that we catalogue these incidences.  i can't even fathom how many eerie stories will emerge. situations that are somehow just part of the fabric a woman wears. let's tag it #voicesinmyhead. because if he spoke, that voice is still likely there, and if he didn't, your voice is probably still processing the encounter. we need to share our stories and let people know that this is what presidential candidate not only condones, but encourages.

that is not to say there isn't a woman who has grabbed a man by the crotch or backed him into a corner forcing herself on him. when rumors of such things tear loose, the woman's reputation is surely taken down several notches. but not that many people talk about these things when men are the perpetrators.

it's the culture we all know. it's the culture we have been working on for so long to heal and transform. it's a culture that has made great strides. and there is such a long steep climb still. we don't want to slide back. we don't want to lose our foothold. 

we need to have all the best arms pulling their way up that hill to victory. these arms DO have to reach out and vote. and my hope IS that they vote for hillary. because if she has enough votes to win, trump won't. and while we might not see wall street reform or world peace or an end to fracking, we WILL hold onto to the sacred female ground we stand on right now, and from where-we-are, we can continue to move forward on the issues that will make a better world for our children. 

as women, we ARE the ultimate creators. the growth and protection of all earthly things begins with us. let's begin by protecting ourselves in this election. let's make sure trump loses.